Freaky Friday: Brock Lenar and Brock Osweiler Bump Heads and Switch Bodes

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5thQ Staff Writer

2021-01-30


UNDISCLOSED LOCATION, FL -- Well, it’s happened again! Brock Lesnar and Brock Osweiler were both late to the annual Convention of the Brocks. Brock Lesnar was making a desperate rush to reach the BallRoom of the Hilton Miami Downtown. Brock Osweiler was making a mad dash to reach the same location. Both men, totaling a combined weight of over 520 lbs, collided head on right in front of mighty oak doors of the Grand BallRoom. A thud that’d rivaled the eruption of the great Krakatoa rang through the hallowed halls of that reviered Hilton Miami Downtown.

Out of the BallRoom sprang the renowned Gym Leader from Pewter City. He knelt before his fellow Brocks, to assess the damage. Osweiler was the first to come to, with a look of extreme bewilderment in his eye. Osweiler shoved Brock aside and rushed into the bathroom. Brock was thoroughly confused.

The Gym Leader knelt next to Lesnar, whose head was beginning to rock back and forth. Lesnar started murmuring something about the Dolphins, when his eyes snapped open. He rubbed his palms against his eyes, groaning:

“NOT AGAIN. This can’t be happening a third time!”

Lesnar sprang up, misjudged his strength, and landed squarely on his chest.

“I must escape this godforsaken, muscle bound maniac’, whispered Lesnar to himself.

Entering the bathroom Lesnar locks eyes with Osweiler in the mirror. They face each other, malice in their gazes. Lesnar places his hands on Osweiler’s shoulders. Osweiler does the same. They begin to furiously bash each other’s heads together, blood beginning to pool around their feet. This ritual has worked twice before, it should also work a third time. The 5thQuarterSports team wishes them well and hopes for a speedy mind reversal.

Who Wrote This Crap?

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5thQ Staff Writer | @5thQSports
The staff writer, because whoever wrote it was too afraid to put thier name on it.